Handling Susannah Page 3

  “I would like to make my decision,” she said softly, looking at Adam. “Before I do, though, I’m wondering if anyone in the room would not care to accept me, should I choose him.”

  She glanced at Clayton and Ezra. As she had predicted, both agreed that they would be honored if she chose them. She then looked at Adam and held her breath. Never had she felt more vulnerable than she did at that moment, waiting for his verdict.

  Adam uncrossed his legs and sat up into a less-relaxed pose. He dropped his gaze to the floor with a frown and appeared to be deep in thought. Susannah could hardly handle the suspense. She wrung her hands and then fiddled with the lace stitched onto her sleeves as she waited.

  Finally, he lifted his head and spoke gently after catching her eye. “If you choose me, Miss Smith, I will accept. But after that, you and I will have a very serious discussion about honesty, and that discussion will not be pleasant for you.”

  Chapter Three

  A shiver went through Susannah, equal parts delight and anticipation. Adam seemed very serious about scolding her for her deception, and though the thought of it certainly was unsavory, she felt pleased that he had indicated he would accept her. She smiled a victorious smile. “I wish to choose you, Mr. Harrington.” She studied him for a sign of happiness over her decision, but he didn’t show any.

  “You may not wish it after our discussion, Miss Smith,” he said ominously, his eyes piercing hers.

  Susannah felt a moment of doubt. Was she making a horrible, irreversible mistake? Maybe she should have listened to that voice in her head.

  Before she could ponder that further, Adam said, “Apologize and say goodbye to the other gentlemen.” His voice had taken an authoritative edge.

  Another tremor went through her. A voice of authority was not something she wanted. No, no, no. She wanted to be in charge. She would have to get her control back somehow, but first things first. Holding out her hand to the two rejected men, she bade them farewell and told them she was sorry for lying. She really did feel guilty, though perhaps not as guilty as Adam thought she should feel.

  When the men had left and she and Adam were alone in the room, he said in a low, firm voice, “Lock the door, Susannah.”

  Hearing her Christian name roll off his tongue made her heart flutter in her chest, and she felt the stirrings of romantic excitement. If he wanted privacy, what was he planning? Perhaps he would take her into his arms and kiss her. Her stomach tightened and a tremor of nervous desire swept over her. She locked the door as instructed and turned to face him.

  This was not happening at all how she had imagined. What she’d pictured in her mind was a long day of giving instructions to the man she chose, ending in a wedding ceremony. Now, though, one glance at Adam’s face told her she was not the one in control, and nothing was certain anymore.

  It wasn’t long before he instructed her again. “Come here and lie over my lap for our discussion, Susannah.”

  She quirked her head to the side, confused. It was a strange way to ask her to sit on his lap. The prospect of it delighted her though. She’d already imagined being wrapped up in his arms while supported by his strong legs. She walked toward him without hesitation, noticing the censure in his gaze deepen as she grew nearer. But she did not allow his stern expression to discourage her. She felt hopeful that he would soon forgive her deception. After all, she had chosen him and she was beautiful. He didn’t yet know about her reputation or her son, so he couldn’t judge her for those things yet. One step at a time.

  When she reached where he was sitting, she sat down on his lap quite provocatively and draped her arms around his neck, causing her bosom to be positioned centimeters from his face. He was to be her husband, and she had no desire to be coy with him. She drew a deep breath that raised her breasts to touch his chin and stared dolefully into his eyes, sincerely believing that her feminine wiles would cause the discussion to be less severe, if not forgotten altogether.

  He inhaled sharply and closed his eyes for a moment, showing her that he was not unaffected by the close proximity of her body, but when he opened them, they were gleaming with disapproval. She saw lust there, too, but his jaw was set in determination not to allow it to sway him from the “discussion.”

  “I said to lie over my lap, woman, not sit on it. You’re a peck and a half of trouble, aren’t you?” He pushed her off, took hold of her arm, and bent her over his knees face down. It happened so fast that it took a moment for her understanding to catch up with his actions. By the time she realized he intended to spank her, he’d tossed up her pretty pink skirt and petticoat. Susannah’s legs flailed in the air and her palms touched the floor. For a moment she felt like she was going to fall, but his large left hand curled firmly around her side and held her in place.

  “Mr. Harrington!” she cried, squirming. “Surely you don’t intend to…” She couldn’t even say the word. Her face felt hot as her blood drained down to it and she could hear her heartbeat pumping in her ears.

  “…spank you?” he finished. “That’s exactly what I intend to do, provided that you accept it. Do you agree to accept my discipline for your deception?” He placed his right hand on her bottom, covered only by frilly drawers, which caused her to squeal. A current of need shot through her body. She hadn’t enjoyed a man’s touch in quite some time, and feeling his strong hand atop an intimate place made her long to be touched more. She did not want to be spanked, however, and he didn’t seem to have any other objective in mind.

  She ran through her options and couldn’t find a single way out of her predicament. She had already rejected the other men. But how could she agree to suffer something so humiliating from the man who would be her husband? Hot tears came to her eyes and she sniffled. Adam’s hand came down in a hard swat that made her gasp in surprise and lift her head.

  “I asked you a question,” he said, his voice stern. “I expect an answer. Will you accept my discipline, yes or no?”

  She shifted a little. Her husband-to-be was far, far stricter than she wanted. She should have listened to that voice in her head! She was used to being spoiled and treated delicately, not manhandled in such a way!

  “What if I say no, Mr. Harrington?” she asked. She knew the answer, but she wanted to delay him and in doing so give her time to process the situation.

  “If you say no, I will place you right side up and bid you farewell. I will also be disappointed, as I do very much want this to work between us. I won’t have a dishonest, inconsiderate wife, though, and I need to know you can accept consequences.”

  Tears of frustration flooded her eyes. Her father had only spanked her once when she was a child, with his belt, and it had hurt terribly, but then he had forgiven her. Perhaps that would be the case with Adam as well. Maybe it wouldn’t be too bad.

  “I will accept,” she whimpered tearfully. “Please don’t hurt me too much.”

  “Are you already crying, Susannah?” he asked, sounding amazed.

  “Yes,” she said honestly. She squeezed her eyes shut in anticipation of the next smack.

  Instead, he rubbed her bottom in circles, causing arousal to intermingle with her anxiety. “A spanking is supposed to hurt, but the pain doesn’t last. Surely it’s not worth so many tears.”

  “I’m scared and embarrassed,” she whimpered.

  “Yeah?” he asked lightly and without sounding the least bit sympathetic. He brought his hand down in another smack, harder this time, causing her to emit a surprised squeak.

  “How do you think I felt when I realized I’d dropped everything to become a candidate in a foolish woman’s game of chance? And how do you suppose those other men feel right now?” He spanked her hard twice more and then waited for a response.

  His words hurt worse than his hand, which hurt plenty too. She hadn’t considered that the men were out anything but time. “I’m sorry,” she said mournfully. “Honest, I am.”

  He resumed spanking her, this time not letting up after a few swa
ts. Every smack was punishing and delivered on the fleshiest part of her cheeks. “As you should be, Miss Smith. I’d like you to answer the question. How do you suppose those men feel?”

  “I don’t know!” she cried. Her husband-to-be spanked hard. Every stroke of his hand caused her to jerk forward, tangling her carefully brushed hair around her face.

  “You do know. You just said how you feel. Repeat that to me, for you are not the only one to feel it.”

  “S-scared and embarrassed?” she stammered, shifting over his lap.

  “That’s right, Miss Smith. Now, I can’t say as I blame you for wanting a few men to choose from, but you should have said that in your letters. You should’ve been honest with us.”

  She sniffled. “I know.”

  “And I imagine those men have lost a lot more than the ability to sit for a few minutes, which is your only punishment. Quite lenient in comparison, wouldn’t you say?”

  It was horrible, hearing him scold her. She felt like he didn’t like her at all and was disappointed in his decision to stay. “Please!” she wailed. “Will you be able to forgive me? I don’t want you to hate me if you’re going to be my husband.”

  He paused, resting his punishing hand on her clenching cheeks. He then chuckled, which surprised her, since he was acting so strict with her.

  Her face grew even warmer, and a bolt of anger shot through her. “You think I’m a joke. You think this is hilarious, me being in pain and humiliated.”

  “No, I certainly don’t,” he argued, and resumed spanking her firmly, causing her to squeal and squirm in his iron grip.

  “Ow ow OWW,” she protested.

  “I don’t think this is funny, and I don’t think you’re a joke. I think you’re naughty. And I think you need to be taught a lesson.”

  “I’ve learned it!” she informed him, as his hand continued to descend on her poor seat.

  “You worrying about me hating you tells me you haven’t often received correction. That’s why I laughed. Am I right about that? Is it rare for you to be spanked?”

  Mercifully, he paused to listen to her. She looked back at him over her shoulder. His brow quirked up at her as he leveled her with his gaze. He looked so very handsome and serious that she temporarily forgot to be outraged over the punishment. She gave him a small nod and whispered, “Yes, it’s rare. I’ve only been spanked once before.”

  He nodded in understanding and resumed the spanking. She groaned and looked back down at the ground, her hair spilling around her face.

  “Your undisciplined days have come to an end, Miss Smith. I won’t have a spoiled, misbehaving wife, so you will suffer correction if you’re mine. I am assuming, of course, that you still want to marry me after this punishment is finished. I could be wrong to make that assumption.”

  “I’ll still marry you, Mr. Harrington, and I will accept your correction,” she said in a resigned voice. What choice did she have, really?

  “I’m glad to hear that, but you might want to wait until I’m finished spanking you to answer. I’m going to remove your drawers now to apply the rest of the correction to your bare bottom.”

  Alarm gripped her. “No!” she shrieked, wriggling and frantically trying to get up. “I can’t bear that, Mr. Harrington!”

  To her surprise and relief, he released his hold on her and allowed her to stand. Her skirts were still bunched up around her waist, and her hands flew to clutch her smarting bottom. She faced Adam but couldn’t meet his eyes. Taking in a shuddering breath, she tried to blink back tears. The tears were mostly from embarrassment, if she was honest with herself. The spanking wasn’t without pain, but her bottom didn’t hurt too terribly now that he’d stopped spanking it.

  “Compose yourself, Miss Smith,” Adam said sternly.

  She gathered her courage and peered at him through wet, lowered lashes. Though his voice had been firm, she could see compassion in his eyes and felt a little better. She had been afraid he would find her ridiculous and view her with contempt, but there was no mockery in his gaze—only mild sternness.

  All feelings of relief quickly vanished when he spoke again. “You know you’ve earned this. Now come back over my knee. If you hadn’t made such a fuss, it would be nearly over by now.”

  “Please, Mr. Harrington,” she pled. “Please don’t take down my drawers.” She rushed to think of an excuse and quickly found one. Proper women didn’t disrobe for a man before marriage. She wasn’t proper, of course, but he didn’t know that yet. She lifted her chin and said with more confidence than she felt, “It isn’t right since we aren’t yet married. I promise I have learned my lesson.”

  He narrowed his eyes at her. She did her best to look contrite, and she was certain the tears aided her in doing so. Most men’s hearts softened when a woman cried, and she could only hope that Mr. Harrington’s did too.

  “Oh, all right,” he relented. “I’ll give you a choice. You may either do as you’re told and come back over my knee where I will apply a few swats to your misbehaving bare ass, or I can finish this after we are married so that it will be deemed proper. Up to you.”

  “After we’re married,” she said immediately. She believed that she would be able to convince him not to finish the spanking that night. If he was anything like other men, he would prefer to engage in other activities—much more pleasurable activities—with her naked body.

  “Very well,” he said, giving her a short nod.

  She arranged her skirts to cover her bottom and wiped her wet cheeks with the backs of her hands. When she lifted teary eyes to meet his, she noticed that his gaze was kind.

  “You all right?"

  “Yes, sir.”

  A slow smile appeared on his handsome face, displaying a dimple that looked quite boyish compared to the rest of him, which looked hard and manly. “My, my, a walloping really straightens you out, doesn’t it? That spanking wasn’t even very hard, and yet suddenly you’re as sweet as a little kitten.”

  “I beg to differ,” she said with a pout.

  His grin widened. “About what, kitten? That you’re sweet or that you’re straightened out?” His voice had a tease in it.

  “You know what I mean! It was a very hard spanking,” she exclaimed in a fit of temper, feeling like he was making fun of her and not liking it one bit.

  “Oh, it was not. Barely a pat and a tickle.” He rose and held out his bent elbow to her. “How about if we go get something to eat and get to know each other a bit? As much as I want to keep staring at your pretty face and tendin’ to your fragile feelings, I’m hungry and in need of some chow.”

  Susannah’s hurt pride faded away. She reached out tentatively and hooked her hand in his elbow. She looked up at him, craning her neck. He was practically a giant. She liked that.

  “You think I have a pretty face, Mr. Harrington?” She was shamelessly fishing for compliments, but she thought she deserved a little sweet-talking after what she had just endured.

  Much to her pleasure, he indulged her. “I’m not blind. You have a pretty everything, darlin’.” He smiled and clapped his Stetson on his head. “Perhaps it’s best I didn’t lower your drawers. Your sweet little bare bottom may have been my undoing.”

  Susannah flushed with happiness at the strange compliment. Maybe this wasn’t a bad choice, after all. He might be strict, but boy was he charming. “You’re very handsome yourself, Mr. Harrington,” she said, allowing him to lead her out of the hotel’s dining room.

  As he led her, she shook her head. He wasn’t supposed to be leading. She was. Sakes alive, what had she gotten herself into?

  Chapter Four

  The rest of the day was spent happily, culminating in a short ceremony that bound them together as man and wife. The more Susannah spoke to Adam, the more she liked him. He behaved gallantly, pulling out her chair for her and standing when she stood. They talked easily like they were old friends, and she delighted in the merriment she saw in his eyes. She could tell that he found her very be
autiful, which was not at all surprising since most men did, but he also seemed to genuinely like her.

  When Adam looked into her eyes and vowed to stay by her side in sickness and in health, Susannah’s heart filled with hope. However, in the back of her mind throughout the day and while they exchanged vows was the knowledge that Adam did not yet know her reputation in town for being a fallen woman. She knew he would discover it eventually, and she could only pray it was after he became totally smitten with her. She used every trick of seduction she knew, brushing up against him lightly, smiling coyly, stroking his ego and hanging on his every word.

  On the way to the cabin after the ceremony, he drove the buggy, another gesture of leadership she hadn’t anticipated. During the first part of the journey, she kept up the lighthearted conversation they had enjoyed most of the day, but as they grew closer to the home they would share together with her son, the realization that Adam was going to find out about Caleb filled her with fear. She searched for the right words to say to him, to prepare him for something she should have mentioned much sooner. Would he dislike raising a son who wasn’t his? When they lay together that night, would he be disappointed to discover she wasn’t a virgin? It was dizzying to think about all that could go wrong.

  It turned out that her new husband was attentive and noticed the change in her demeanor. “You’re awfully quiet,” he said, glancing over at her. “It’s been a long day. Are you tired?”

  It was dark, and she could only see the outline of his profile, but his voice was kind and she could imagine that he was looking at her kindly too. It made her feel wretched. He was about to find out that she had once again kept pertinent information from him. No doubt he would see this in an even worse light than her less-than-upstanding method for finding a husband.

  “There’s something I need to tell you,” she lamented. She shifted in her seat and looked ahead, noticing that the cabin was fast approaching. She could already see the coal oil lamp that burned in the window.